Missional Teaching - Joyce Lau
“You are trash. Not even recycling bins will take you.” — That line just wouldn’t go away in my head when I first started teaching four years ago. My desire for perfectionism drove me to work more and demand too much of myself. I was angry at myself for not being good enough. I was even more infuriated with God. I knew He called me to be a teacher, yet at that moment it felt like He had turned a blind eye to my suffering.
At that time, I didn’t realise how the expectations I put on myself also influenced the way I taught and connected with my students. I knew teaching was a way for me to live missionally and that I was called to love and embrace my students. Instead of doing that, I found the pressure I placed on myself transferring outwardly and my students also felt the impact of meeting my expectations.
“I am not a perfect human, and I make mistakes, but God sees me and loves me no matter what.”
At the height of my pain, God opened my eyes to see how supportive my family and colleagues were to me. Their support and encouragement helped me become less critical of myself while still acknowledging my effort and desire for impact. I learned to work less using my ways but be more dependent on Him. I learned not to cry alone, but to cry before the Lord. I also learned to put relationships first, instead of only burying myself in work.
God has shown me through my relationship with Him that often all I need is to be in His presence, and my students are no different. The boys and girls at my school often came to me with doubts and frustrations, and as I listened, I also prayed for wisdom to give them the right advice. God has shown me that offering my listening ears and being present with them matters much more than appearing to be a sage.
Things started to transform after this point. My students found me more approachable, caring, and my lessons less daunting. They now love sharing with me, telling me secrets like little chirping birds, and in turn I feel comfortable showing my vulnerable side to them. I’ve had the opportunity to walk with depressed students and those who struggle with stress and the pressures of needing to be “good”. I am beyond grateful to share my past with them, encouraging them in their baffling times, and even pray with them.
As a teacher - I’ve learned the key for me to live missionally is to embrace my humanness and my students’ too.
